Normally I don’t celebrate any holidays (Comic Con is about the closest thing to a holiday I’m willing to celebrate), but Easter is different. It’s a special time a year where we all get to remember the wonderful things one noble deity did to ensure an eternal after life for all of us. Yup, you guessed it, I’m talking about the Easter Bunny.
He’s a magical furry critter who was nailed to a piece of wood, left there to dry, and then raised himself from the dead a mere three days later. Of course we all know how this zombie bunny then went on to promise the same zombie rising to all his most devote followers (provided of course they maintain regular cash donations, semi-regular faith building repetitive ceremonies, and the occasional act of extreme violence against any non-believers). Then he floated off into the sky on a glowing elevator made of rainbow light promising one day to return. It really is awesome how a mere two thousand years later we as a society still worship this heroic bronze age rabbit despite the vast advances made in science, technology, engineering, medicine, and social equality.
We have to ask, though, what other long eared rodents could possibly be cooler than the Easter Bunny? Well kids, your older, wiser, better looking, elder brethren here at Atomic Moo smashed our collective heads together and came up with this list of rock star Leporidae (I’m pretty sure that’s science speak for “rabbit”, or foot fungus… it might be the foot fungus) that will impress you more than a colored egg popping ancient symbol of fertility. Here we go…
You may have seen these before, but if not please go visit Angry Alien Productions and watch their very funny 30 Second Bunnies animations, featuring parodies of Star Wars, Star Trek, Caddy Shack and many more
9. The Energizer Bunny
Next up is a rabbit, that if it weren’t for one commercial, I would never consider better/cooler than anything, let alone the all powerful Easter Bunny. Check out this shameless grab for your wallet by advertisers from the mid-nineties featuring the Energizer Bunny and a very popular dark lord of the Sith.
I’m probably one of a dying breed of people who remember the great comic strips of Berkeley Breathed but if you’re fortunate enough to have ever read Bloom County or Outland then you’ll probably remember Hodge-Podge, one of the best smart-ass, Basselope humping rabbits, to ever exist.
7. Roger Rabbit & Jessica Rabbit
The only thing that makes this rabbit better than a bunny who hands out free chocolate, is his wife. Roger Rabbit may be annoying to watch, but damn did they get the curves just right on Jessica Rabbit.
6. Bunny From Monty Python
Until today, I didn’t know this thing even had a name. The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog is the infamous bunny that tore through King Arthur’s Knights of the Round Table in the legendary film, Monty Python’s: Quest for the Holy Grail. In a contest between a bunny that paints eggs and a bunny that gnaws flesh, the egg painter loses every time.
5. Playboy Bunnies
Never saw a critter shake a tail quite the same way these vixens can. The original Playboy Bunnies were waitresses at the Playboy club back in the sixties, but in 2006 a new club opened. The gorgeous girls are still around (thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster!) and can be found at the Palms hotel in Las Vegas California, and in my opinion best damn bunnies… EVER!
I think I first read this story way back in the third or fourth grade, and to be honest I don’t remember much, but any story about a vampire rabbit who sucks a carrot dry has got to be worth something, right? Check out this amazing art work of Bunnicula by artist Robert Bowen. That’s just something you don’t want to see in real life, ever.
3. Greg the Bunny
I hate spoilers, so just go watch it. Serious, better than Christmas, Easter, and Donuts. Go watch… now!
2. Usagi Yojimbo
1. Bugs Bunny
Smooth, smart, and damn sexy in a dress, you can’t get any better a bunny than bugs. The Looney Tunes Cartoons are some of my favorite bits of animation and comedy ever made, and Bugs is king of them all. Bugs Bunny is a classic and the comedy produced by his creators still holds to this day. Below are a few of my favorite Bugs Bunny cartoons and I hope they help you finish out this Easter in a good way.
Happy Easter everybody.